What Are You Doing Today?

The farmer may only be planting a seed,
but if he opens his eyes
he is feeding the whole world.
~ Omaha Bee

This opening quotation kicked off a precious story about a three-person construction crew who was approached by a man asking what each was doing. The first said he was working for pittance and was getting tired, the second said he was laying concrete, the third (a woman, in the version I read) said, “I am building a hospital where people will receive needed medical care and many lives will be saved.”

The man responded, “Yes… You are building my hospital.”

The man was the benefactor, and he made the woman head over the entire project.

I don’t know if this story actually happened as it is written, but the essence of this story is happening all over the planet at every moment as we are either working for a pittance, laying concrete, or saving lives.

What are you doing today?

Deep Spring Center
Thought for Today

You ask why there seem to be increasing obstacles. If you’re muddling around thinking about being more loving and caring and connected in your lives but not really doing much about it, negative polarity can relax. They see you’re not really getting anywhere. Since WWII, there has been a tremendous move toward positive polarity in the world. Many old souls are coming into birth, especially in the past 30 years. Here are many beings really intent on finding a way to live with love in the world rather than with an ‘eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth’ doctrine. Negative polarity looks around and says, ‘What’s happening? This is getting out of hand! Look how loving they’re becoming. Let’s toss in some opposition here.’ ~ Aaron

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Order, Disorder, Reorder

Twelve minutes late coming to join the Southern Circle Poets writing group, I have been transplanting some flowering things that have been blooming beautifully along the left edge of our driveway all summer. We are scheduled to have work begin tearing up the old concrete and blacktop, and putting in a continuous concrete driveway from the sidewalk to the door of our barn. John hopes it will work for shuffleboard!!!

Yesterday when I mentioned my desire to transplant the flowering things, he queried as to if they were wildflowers or weeds. “What is the difference?” I asked. “Perhaps we just call them weeds because no one sells them at the garden shoppe.” They are beautiful, they are healthy, and they are contributing oxygen to the planet. It is worth a try to keep them alive….

Simultaneously, I have been going through major disorder in my front bedroom/office/meditation hall. My HP PC crossed the rainbow bridge. (English: My desktop computer cannot be repaired.) I had big stuff tied to that PC: a big tower, a huge monitor, an external camera, a professional Brother laser printer, great-sounding Bose speakers. The PC’s valued accessories generated a need within me to hold onto it all when we downsized three years ago. And now what was is no more.



Things have changed, and I am now working towards freeing up space. I will use my laptop as my ONLY computer. Unless you count my iPhone….

So for days now I have been purging files to get the contents of four two-drawer file cabinets down to three.

I am still somewhat in grief about my Brother printer. This has been a fantastic printer. I have cranked out client intake forms, NLP certificates, myriad lunch-and-learn handouts, and lots of poetry.

Perhaps it has not yet been determined what will go or stay. Not only is this printer quite large, but the installation is on a CD and my laptop does not have a CD player. I know one can purchase an external CD player but I just don’t know if I want to accommodate the size of this printer.

I will figure it out as I go along. I did determine that I can use my Bose speakers with my laptop when I want really good sound.

Things are in disorder around schools. Two Midwestern universities announced on Tuesday that they will be modifying their fall plans because of the coronavirus pandemic. University of Notre Dame has suspended all in-person classes for at least two weeks due to the swell of coronavirus since students returned August 10. A letter from the President of Michigan State University stated: “Effective immediately, we are asking undergraduate students who planned to live in our residence halls this fall to stay home and continue their education with MSU remotely.”

A friend who teaches K-12 was struggling with whether or not to take an early retirement from teaching. An important piece for her is that she can now retire with medical benefits — a big deal as she is a survivor of breast cancer.

So much is going on. Old habit energy is amplified. Some people are paralyzed by panic. Others are already seeing opportunities opening up. I suggested my friend might benefit by creating and using a breath prayer, such as “I will figure it out as I go along….”

My friend laughed so hard she cried, but the truth is we have all been doing that all along. In this ‘disorder’ phase we can see that clearly. It allows you to relax about it.

I have found things in this office space while purging that I did not even know I had. You do want to keep the important stuff. As you anticipate reorder, notice what is truly important. Let go of the everything else. We will figure it out as we go along…

Look at all the space that is being created!

Mario’s Italian Market Remains!

In response to “When Everything Falls Apart, What Remains?” posting, I received a precious email message from a Florida writer-friend.

Thank you, Paul, for igniting my heart by sharing your powerful writing of your poignant experience.

(Soft edits only!)

Welcome to the Yellow Brick Road, and please come again….

    Dear Debra,

    I stared at the title of your recent blog for moments before I opened and read the email.

    The title described exactly, in a few short words, what I’ve been feeling for weeks. Seems that we’ve experienced a string of negative events these past few months that have made July/August 2020 among the most unforgettable in recent memory.

    I’ve tried to remain positive, yet have found this challenging.

    Although not the root cause, COVID-induced separation is a likely contributor to a nagging sense of disconnect.

    I wonder sometimes if we’ve gotten too good at “social distancing.” We stay at home; work from home in separate rooms; spend all day in different mindsets. We frown under our mask if someone is shopping in the wrong direction in the supermarket aisle. We are cautioned to avoid people who are sick, when we used to be encouraged to do the opposite.

    E.M. Forster begins his novel “Howard’s End” with the words “only connect.”

    A final thought on human interaction and connectedness: One of our favorite activities since moving to Southwest Florida is shopping at Mario’s Italian Market in Fort Myers.

    Having grown up in Brooklyn with parents who were raised in Little Italy, I feel qualified to comment on the salumeria experience in America.

    The magic of Mario’s is that everyone there—regardless of ethnicity or nationality—is for that moment bound together by a familiarity and fondness for this food. We make sure that number 75 doesn’t answer before we hold up our ticket number 76. We ask the woman who ordered the long-hot peppers if they’re really hot; she replies with a smile and left-right wag of her hand. The counter man offers a sample slice of Calabrian salami—an inducement to order a half-pound instead of a quarter. We discuss the merits of gorgonzola versus blue cheese with a stranger.

    Perhaps this is what will remain when everything falls apart.

Perhaps, when everything falls apart, what remains is everything that is loved….

You are loved, Paul!

When Everything Falls Apart, What Remains?

I am technically practicing silence in a meditation retreat at Heartwood Refuge and Retreat Center in Hendersonville, North Carolina. But I am attending via Zoom and my fingers are on the keyboard. The focus of this retreat with John Orr is When Everything Falls Apart, What Remains? This was John’s blurb about the retreat:

    Our world has seen a massive upheaval as a result of the coronavirus pandemic, the continuing racism and political divisiveness. We are all having to deal with changes in our lives and the communities we live in. At times it may seem like everything is falling apart and we are left with a profound feeling of uncertainty. Now more than ever the dharma and our meditation practice can be a refuge to meet the present challenges.

    During this retreat we will explore the ancient teachings of:

    The Don’t Know Mind (making friends with uncertainty)

    Impermanence (this too shall pass)

    Dissolution (when everything falls apart, what remains?)

    Non Duality (Something isn’t separate from Everything)

    Our meditation draws on Mindfulness, Vipassana and Pure Awareness. Clear instruction will be offered for all levels.

    Loving Kindness and Compassion Meditation and chanting are also part of our retreat together. A special focus will be how to practice and hold our hearts open with the inconvenience, discomfort and uncertainty of today’s world.

On Wednesday afternoon before the retreat began, I had yet another tender conversation with our daughter about our diverse approach to precautions related to this virus. We did not argue, but we make very different choices. A few hours later, during the opening introductions, I received news from a good friend–also attending via Zoom–that she was not feeling well. Here is the rest of the story, posted on Facebook a few moments ago in response to another friend, Kate:

Kate posted:
I feel like I’m one of the few people still practicing social distancing, and sheltering in place. FB is full of pics of people out to restaurants, at pools and beaches or sharing space with relatives they haven’t seen in awhile. I would love to see our kids but I can’t guarantee I’m not infected nor can they. Am I just over sensitive to this?

I responded to Kate:
Kate, THANK YOU! I could have written this post. Today I would add that another friend, thinking the same way you and I have been thinking, relented and got together with her family.

Her adult children drove in from out of state, each household traveling in separate vehicles, taking proper precautions along way.

Each household brought a tent. My friend rented a party-potty and set up an outdoor kitchen. My friend’s family did not enter her house, and when the family went hiking each family drove in his/her own car. They maintained social distance along the trail.

Shortly after they arrived, her daughter’s partner received a call from work that his colleague had tested positive. He got in their vehicle and drove to the nearest location and had a Covid test.

Of course the results from his test didn’t come back until AFTER he was already back home, and not until AFTER he was already symptomatic. His test came back positive.

On Wednesday evening, gathered via Zoom, my friend reported that she had a “wicked cold” and had gone to get a Covid test. She would know in a week.

Yesterday, she sent a private message via Zoom chat, “I tested positive. I have COVID.”

Even the precautions level that you and I are committed to, may not be enough….

Kate, keep teaching by example! So much to learn from this.

❤️🙏🏼🦋

Deep Spring Center
Thought for Today

It is not the teacher who is the authority; it is the dharma that is the authority. It is sati, mindful presence, which is the authority. It is awareness, which is the authority. It is the deeply loving and open heart that is the authority. It is the Ground of Being, the divine essence of each, which is the authority. The teacher who has done his or her work, understands the practice and has developed a depth of realization of how things are, has no need to be the authority to another, but is willing to offer what he or she knows with a certainty, offering it for the guidance of others, but with no need to say, ‘This is it!’ If it really is it, others will discover that through their own practice. ~ Aaron

Transformation

Recently, I included some information about transformation from J. Krishnamurti in my clergy “Insight’s” article.

Transformation is said to occur only when NONE of the following are present:

    desire to change the experience
    judgment
    analysis
    justification
    grasping
    selfing
    resisting
    believing that “I am witnessing”

Since the coronavirus stay-safe-at-home order in March, I have done daily yoga with Kathy Zerler. We started out by phone, but when it became obvious that the YMCA could not safely and legally hold the classes onsite any time soon, we started recording her yoga classes using Zoom. Kathy’s videos are available on Youtube by putting “Kathy Zerler yoga” into your search engine.

This morning I had a heart-felt experience of transformation — exactly as Krishnamurti describes it — during the guided meditation at the end of class. “Your World is Your Greatest Creation” was published in Kathy’s Joyful Meditaions:

Imagine yourself on a solitary beach at sunset. You are very relaxed after a long day…

You come upon a raft that is half on the beach and half in the water. Your name is written on a flag that waves from a mast in the center of the raft. You understand that this raft is yours to use for as long as you need it. You decide to load up every person who has ever hurt you. Politely, you help each person onto the raft. When they are all seated, you toss in the baggage they have heaped on you along with a few things of your own that you no longer need. You push the raft out toward the setting sun and watch as these people and their baggage float out of your life.

You are allowed to let them go. Just let them go….

I have heard Kathy do this guided meditation several times before, but something truly remarkable happened today when the only person that got into the raft was me!

I was alone in the raft and I could see clearly that only my distorted thoughts, beliefs, attitudes had hurt me.

I gently oared the raft toward the setting sun in perfect peace.

Transformation….

To Open or Not to Open

Acceptance is the goal —
acceptance and freedom to choose what we want and need to do
to take care of ourselves with that person.

We can become free of the patterns of the past.

We are recovering.

Progress is the goal.

~ The Language of Letting Go,
Daily Meditations on Codependency

by Melody Beattie

Last evening I received an email message from our local YMCA with a subject line: Action Needed! Ask state lawmakers to reopen your Y!

This morning in an online news article Dr. Fauci warns of “early signs” that an outbreak could be brewing in Tennessee, Kentucky, Ohio and Indiana. Right now, 93%, or 89 of Tennessee’s 95 counties, have a transmission rate “above the threshold.”

Related to the coronavirus, most everyone would agree that progress is the goal. Obviously, however, opinions differ regarding in which direction progress lays.

A friend heard on the news this morning that risk of exposure in our area is currently 4%. Her comment was that the low percentage may give people the feeling that not complying with guidelines (primarily wearing masks and maintaining safe distancing) is safe.

I said, “If you want to untangle a knotted string, it is crucial to know which end of the string you are holding.”

Four percent is a direct result of the strict guidelines that have been in place. The number does not mean, “Oh, we don’t have much Covid, so lets throw a big party to celebrate.” Rather, what it really means is, “Thankfully, our actions are making a difference, and lives are being saved. We can get through this together.”

I took two photos this morning. One is a stink bug on my kitchen window; the other a moth on my office window.


Seeing the delicate moth generated an inner smile; the big fat stink bug, repulsion.

I understand businesses wanting to reopen, but is reopening an indoor exercise facility wise? Is sending out an email message urging members to pressure lawmakers to allow them to reopen a responsible act?

This morning as I notice my inner preferences, I open email to the quotation from Abraham Hicks:

If you will simply imagine your life as you want it to be, all cooperative components will be summoned. And even more important, all components that are summoned will cooperate. It is Law. The experience that you have with others is about what you evoke from them.

Excerpted from The Vortex on 8/31/09

Our Love,
Esther
(and Abraham and Jerry)

I imagine Tennessee learning from Florida. I imagine Y members writing to the Y expressing the willingness to be patient. I imagine the stinky and the delicate co-existing in the balance of nature. I imagine acceptance and freedom to choose what we want and need to do to take care of ourselves…. I imagine all beings coming to the end of suffering.

Queen Stinky

For this is wisdom; to live,
To take what fate, or the Gods, may give.
~ Laurence Hope

Wouldn’t it be great to have the name Hope! Or Faith! Cope is the maiden name of a friend. My own name (Debra) means busy bee in colloquialism, and she who brings the sublime light of the creator in the Egyptian cartouche.

“We can’t control the events of our lives…” was the next line in the daily reading that opened with the quotation by Laurence Hope.

This was also the theme of Tuesday’s meditation group with Sheilana Massey, who asked us to reflect on whether we are living our life, or letting our life live us. She asked, “When things are not going our way, are we trying to make it do that?”

Someone shared a Quaker Saying, “The way will open related to that.”

I asked, “Do we have to make something wrong in order to learn?”

A woman mentioned how scientists and mathematicians are now coming to the same conclusions about the world spiritualists have long held.

I have been dancing with demons expressing as insecurity around lack of formal education, comparing my poetry writing to others, and feeling not good enough. Familiar stories….

Last evening just about dusk we had a surprise visitor at our bird feeder.

Reading in Animal-Speak, by Ted Andrews:

Skunk teaches how to give respect, expect respect, and demand respect.

It is self-assured and confident in itself.

If skunk has shown up, it can help you with this particular aspect.

(p. 312-313)

Yes, I have been dancing with demons but I have come to value the dancing as exercise — not in futility, but fertility.

This particular skunk is absolutely gorgeous. I have never seen one so white or so fluffy. My sister, Janis, named this one Queen Stinky. I like that name very much….

My Longings

“Strive to be uncynical,
to be a hope-giving force,
to be a steward of substance.”
~ Maria Popova
Bulgarian-born, American-based writer

Last evening as we finished dominoes via Zoom, I asked what the most significant news of the day was. My friend said probably that the Trump administration ordered hospitals to bypass the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and send all COVID-19 patient information to a central database in Washington, meaning that the CDC was no longer going to have access to the real-time data about the coronavirus.

I had a heavy sensation low in my gut.

I drew the 5 of Clouds, Comparison, from the Osho deck before I went to bed. I sent the message to my friend. “Just look around. All is needed, and everything fits together. It is an organic unity; nobody is higher and nobody is lower, nobody superior, nobody inferior. Everybody is incomparably unique.” I slept rather fitfully.

When I woke this morning, I knew I was dreaming again, but these images like the past several dreams of children needing support are gone before my feet hit the floor.

My mind is very clear, however, about the “Say Only” story of the importance of reserving judgment as things are unfolding. I first read this story in The Eye of the Storm by Max Lucado. I have since learned that it predates Lucado and Christianity, and is still true….

Perhaps President Trump will be able to report data so that those who have discounted the gravity of the virus and been defiant about protective measures will be able to tolerate (hear) the truth from someone they trust.

I must begin by calling forth my own trust and calling forth his higher guidance.

I looked back over several recent Daily Quotes from Aaron:

July 8, 2020
When enough of you are ready to hold the real vision of a world at peace, where beings do not manipulate, steal, kill or otherwise harm each other, the capacity to hold that vision will emerge in world leaders. You will call them forth. They do not lead you so much as you invite them! The effective leader can only walk where some are ready to follow.

July 13, 2020
Bring into your heart and mind the president of this country and others who help to guide him as he makes his decisions. He has a difficult job. You may not agree with his decisions. But certainly you will agree that in his deepest heart, he hopes that his choices for this country will bring peace in the long run if not sooner. This is a man under enormous pressure and he needs your loving wishes even if you say no to his choices. ‘As you strive to guide this nation, may your heart remain open to love and as free as is possible from fear. May you be happy and find peace.’

July 14, 2020
You are ready to take this step, ready not only to be awakened but to help the whole Earth awaken, each of you in your own way. I’m not suggesting you’re all going to be like the Buddha, with his path. Your way of awakening the Earth may simply to be to plant an enlightened garden, a garden of plants that you co-create rather than order around. How do we co-create with the Earth? How do we co-create with each other? How do we use our power and unlimitedness in ways that do no harm?

July 15, 2020
You as a world are inviting conflict but then not doing the needed practice with it, so you must invite it again and again. You are like the child in school doing endless multiplication table drills; they are unpleasant but you have not studied the tables, and will not, so the teacher repeats the drills. Your inattention calls forth the repetition. If you wish the drills to cease, learn the tables.

Aaron’s daily quotes are not selected. The quotes were placed into an archive, and each day one is randomly generated. Some quotes may have never been published, some pop up with regularity, and I have seen some publish two days in a row. Aaron himself established this random generation as a condition when the Daily Quotes began to be shared.

The impact of the coronavirus, and the divisiveness of of sisters and brothers is unpleasant. Wish the drills to cease; learn the tables.

Sue Monk Kidd’s novel, The Book of Longings, is a mesmerizing work of fiction. Ana—a rebellious and gifted young woman of Galilee, meets and marries Jesus. Before their meeting, early in the book, we witness Ana in a clandestine rooftop meeting with her aunt, Yaltha, another unusual woman of the time.

“Do you know what an incantation bowl is?” Yaltha asks Ana. “In Alexandria we women pray with them. We write our most secret prayer inside them. Like this.”

Yaltha places a finger inside the bowl and moves it in a spiraling line around the sides of the bowl. “Every day we sing the prayer. As we do, we turn the bowl in slow circles and the words wriggle to life and spin off toward heaven.”

My most secret prayer has been written into my “incantation bowl” and I will sing this prayer every day: May all beings be happy and find peace; may we awaken wisdom mind; filling the universe with love; joy; kindness; and compassion.

Overcast

Overcast

It is overcast today
Four months since I
freely hugged
or leaned over the
puzzle table
saying, “Where do you think
this piece goes?”
to my companion

In search of where each piece fits
Longing for the satisfaction
completion brings

The sun is up there
Still shining
but my world feels grey today

I still embrace those I love
In my hands I cradle
sweet faces
in my heart
even though it is overcast today

I wonder how you got where you are, here by the edge of the concrete, where you bloom.

I also wonder how I got where I am.

It occurs to me that I might be a volunteer like this precious petunia. The conditions are right for our growth. Mine and this purple pretty.

As a writer, I have never been afraid I would have nothing to say. Never has the empty page intimidated me. The space is invitation. The movement of my fingers on the keyboard itself an inspiration. I watch letters appear as if by magic, having left my discursive mind at the door.

This is a time like none other. What I have to say seems to have been said better by others.

I witness this blankness on the page as evidence of the void my heart feels. Not once in his thirty years have I gone this long without being with my him. My first grandchild. My grandson. I remember well his words, “When I am not in my house, and you are not in your house, I am going to miss you.”

He was two.

We have met half-way, in Colombus, Indiana, for the weekend. We are staying in a suite at the Holiday Inn. His grandpa and I sleeping in one room and his mom and he sleeping in the other.

We two are the only ones awake. The small round table and the two chairs where we are seated as he moves the cheerios around in his bowl bear witness to our soft voices as he verbalizes our one heart.

He points to our separate rooms as he speaks. He has a good sense of what is to come. He knows his grandpa and I will go back to Michigan and he will go with his mom back to Tennessee.

He knows we will long for one another.

He knows his mom will wait until he is asleep before she heads south as his grandpa and I head north. Otherwise he would cry and nothing would console him.

I now gather these memories in the tendrils of my current longing — my longing to hold so much and so many.

It is overcast today.

I allow my mind’s eye to blink away the tears until I can see far enough into our future to touch his flesh, smell his breath, and feel the roar of relief.

We must be gentle with ourselves as we navigate the waters of our emotions.

I Concur

The weather changes very quickly. At 8:45 today, my friend sent a text suggesting we cancel our 9 a.m. bike ride. Rain and thunderstorms were in the forecast. My response: “I concur.”

Concur is one of those words rarely used. It means to agree, be in accord, go along, be in harmony, be in sympathy, see eye to eye, be of the same mind, or be of the same opinion. It also means to happen or occur at the same time; coincide.

On one hand, I can see why the word is rarely used. On the other hand, it should be tattooed on our foreheads. Case in point, my recent letter to the editor:

Confusion and misinformation about COVID-19 has run rampant, making matters worse. Individuals have to make their own choices, but our individual choices affect how we come through this as a whole.

As a spokesperson for and practitioner of what has been called alternative medicine or holistic health for almost 30 years, I see two vital points of clarity:

First: At any moment, you cannot be 100% confident you aren’t an asymptomatic carrier. Just as chicken pox is highly contagious before a person knows he or she has the virus, many people are being exposed to COVID-19 by individuals who do not know they have the virus.

Second: Just breathing can spread this virus. Talking, laughing, and singing are as dangerous as coughing. Infectious aerosols can accumulate especially indoors, but also in any poorly circulating air, and can then easily be inhaled into the lungs.

Studies are being done as quickly and effectively as possible due to collaboration in the global scientific community.

Initially the CDC said to wear a mask only if you were sick or caring for someone who was sick. But this was due primarily to the global shortage of masks that were desperately needed by those on the front lines. Research has found that wearing masks significantly lowers the risk of spreading the virus, and that many unnecessary deaths will be prevented if everyone wears a mask. Mask-wearing has been widely adopted in Asia since SARS, and has been seen as a civic duty and a signal of “support” to health-care workers and the national economy.

Myriad reasons exist for not wearing a mask: Masks can be uncomfortable, they fog up your glasses, they are hot, some people feel claustrophobic in them, hearing can be compromised.

But there is only one reason to do the right thing.

You wear a mask and safe distance not because of what you might GET, but because of what you might GIVE!

It goes against our nature to isolate. We are social creatures. It goes against our nature to wear masks. But our nature has been shaped.

By 9:00 this morning, just 15 minutes after our text concurring to cancel our bike ride, the skies were clear. I called my friend and said, “Let’s get on our bikes and ride toward one another.” We did just that. And we had lovely sharing.

The previous evening she had heard a talk about why it is vital we bring native plants to suburban yards. A talk by Doug Tallamy, an entomologist at University of Delaware, author of Bringing Nature Home: How You Can Sustain Wildlife with Native Plants. From Doug’s website: Garden as if life depended upon it. You see, native plants support pollinators and food webs far better than introduced ornamentals, and some native plants support much more life than others. Choosing the best plants for your area is the key to success.

Heading home from our ride, as I turned onto my road I was gifted an amazing view of nature’s linear wildflower garden! I pulled into the entrance of our park, got off my bike, and walked out to the road to take a photo. (See Sacred Story: Linear Garden.) Right there, without any fertilizer, and no need for irrigation, nature’s gorgeous, life-sustaining plants.

Perhaps nothing since the Civil War has revealed our ability to see things differently from those we love the way this coronavirus has.

Some see beauty and perfection when looking at a perfectly manicured lawn with the sprinklers twirling—totally missing the warning signs.

The neighborhood in which we rode today is proliferated with a variety of evergreens planted widely in many housing developments a couple of decades ago. Those trees are dying a premature death. An appropriate species, but not native to this zone. Pines are among the oldest trees on Earth. Ponderosa pines, common throughout the western United States, have a lifespan of 300 to 500 years, with an 800-year-old tree documented in Utah.

Shortly after we got home from our ride, my friend sent a text: Raining quite hard here! Lucky us.

Our nature has been shaped just as surely as have our landscapes. We need the rain. We need the native plants. Right now, we need the masks.

I so appreciated reading the words of a friend on his Facebook post: “I will wear my mask when out in public to respect your right,” and I also felt the sting that came with the rest of his sentence: “to live out your lives in fear.”

Noticing the warning signs does not mean one is living out life in fear.

Where are the bees?