I have been safe sheltering for one week because of the global outbreak of COVID-19.
Today I baked cookies.
I used all of the flour, all of the brown sugar, 4 of the eggs, and almost the last of the butter.
While my action might seem mundane to some, to me it was holy.
Canadian friends, Davey and Eli, are heading home tomorrow. Davey loves my chocolate chip cookies. I wrote: “Health Food for Your Safe Travels” on the lid.
After Fred repaired my built in microwave a few years ago, I gave him oatmeal raisin cookies and a card: A dozen cookies and a million thanks. He quipped, “I would rather have a dozen thanks and a million cookies!” Since that time, I always bake and pack the baker’s dozen for him. It is a sacrament.
Nancy Green was offered either or both. She chose oatmeal raisin. I learned today they are her preference. This is a time for learning….
Along with Nancy’s cookies, I delivered an N-95 mask for a friend-of-a-friend. (See Sacred Story: N-95.)
Yesterday, I used the last half-cup of heavy whipping cream. Our friends/neighbors generously take us out on their pontoon boat, so she received the last two vegan bran muffins with her favorite devonshire cream.
I wish I could get the oatmeal raisin cookies and vegan bran muffins to Joel Bowman in Michigan. Those are his two favorites.
I wish I could get chocolate chip cookies to the folks across the street who are back in Chattanooga, Tennessee. I had planned to take some to them when we were in Chattanooga to attend the college graduation of our granddaughter, Courtney Nicole Ross. No graduation ceremony at UT this year of COVID-19.
I told Courtney we will have Larry Britton use Photoshop to create a blast of an event for her. Their motto is “If you can dream it, you can make it.”
Her grandpa and I paid the $100 for her gown. She is the first woman to graduate college in my family line. My grandma did not, my mom did not, I did not, and Courtney’s mom did not. Congratulations, Courtney. We are so proud of you.
I would make pasta salad with nothing but dressing for you. And Kraft Mac and Cheese.
Preparing and sharing food is as ancient as human civilization.
I think of events I have been in the kitchen for.
I have worn out many an apron….
Earlier today a friend sent this powerful prose about how our staying at home is healing the earth.
“And the people stayed home. And read books, and listened and rested, and exercised, and made art and played games, and learned new ways of being, and were still. And listened more deeply. Some meditated, some prayed, some danced. Some met their shadows. And the people began to think differently. And the people healed. And in the absence of people living in ignorant, dangerous, mindless and heartless ways, the earth began to heal. And when the danger passed, and the people joined together again, they grieved their losses and made new choices, and dreamed new images and created new ways to live and heal earth fully, as they had been healed.”
~ Kitty O’Meara
Today I am no less aware of the unfathomable losses and unprecedented uncertainty related to the COVID-19 pandemic, but I am more aware how the majority of the people on earth slowing down for this time is having an immediate and potentially everlasting benefit to the planet itself.
Many are being kinder.
Many are realizing how fortunate most of us are.
Many are learning the distinction between needs and wants.
I am grateful to be part of all of this. My pantry may be running low on some things but my heart is filled to overflowing with gratitude and love….
Buttering my bread, I wonder if I will run out of either or both before this is over. I notice the habit pattern of the worry brain. Will John continue to have cream for his coffee?
Being comfortable or satiated will end long before risk of malnutrition or starvation.
Questioning the ethics of having someone deliver food to me: my desire to have my favorite tea overriding the safety or even the life of another.
Last evening, choking on a piece of anniversary steak, not quite able to swallow (even saliva) for a few seconds, compassion for those dying from this virus without breath flooded my body.
COVID-19.
Tucked within all of this inconvenience is such tender truth. I am at this moment still among the more fortunate. I am not separate from anything that is happening, although I am insulated from the worst of it.
Remembering a small book I read about the children orphaned by the bombing raids of World War II. “Someone had the idea of sending each child to bed with a piece of bread to hold. Bread, real food to hold. And they could finally sleep because they knew that they would wake up and have something to eat in the morning.” (See Sleeping with Bread: Holding What Gives You Life, by Dennis Linn.)
Perhaps I should sleep with a favorite bag of tea.
When I exit the master bedroom, having been on Zoom with my writing group, John has made egg salad. I say, “Oh, Honey, I wish you hadn’t used the eggs. Did you not hear me say I had found a couple cans of tuna in the cupboard?”
“I didn’t want tuna,” he snapped. “We can get more eggs.”
“How are we going to do that?” I ask.
“You can call and have deliveries made. They will deliver food right to your door.”
Whether his tone, words, or energy, I feel and inquire, “Are you annoyed with me?”
“I am,” he admits, as he walks out of the kitchen.
I take the lump in my throat back with me to the master bedroom where my laptop is and I put my fingers on the keyboard.
Breathe….
Earlier this morning I had a phone conversation about the ethics of going to the bank to make a deposit. It is a rather large check. It felt safer to do what was familiar: to go to the bank. Safer for all sentient beings?
Whose lives are put on the line to deliver our eggs to the grocery store, to move them from the grocery store to the people who order them from their safe shelter?
I feel that familiar tension—sadness— of sharing life with those who view the world so differently. I am so mad at him for his self-centered world view. It frightens me. In that feeling, I gently witness the sense of “selfing” I have created again.
No individual “I” is separate, neither are “mine” exempt.
The pandemic will end more easily as I see the truth about this distinction….
It is surreal that I posted my previous blog just yesterday. I did say this self-selected social isolation may not last forever, it may just feel that way.
Actually, I don’t really mind the solitude. Last evening Barbara Brodsky asked our Dharma Path group to notice how very little is different about this from retreat, which we all love.
Well, one difference is that on retreat we have no news.
The Awakened Heart group was asked to ponder these points:
1. Please reflect on some ways you are able to ground yourselves in Love even with the fears and other emotions brought forth by Covid-19.
2. How can we each become a true power of Love in our present world, offering the expressions of Love to help release suffering?
3. “We are what we think; with our thoughts we make the world.” (Dhammapada)
4. What if the whole world were to shift from negative, fear-based thoughts about this virus, into a strong, clear compassion?
5. How does our practice help?
6. How to we practice with fear and anxiety?
Aaron says a high vibration makes your energy field like Teflon, so the virus is unable to stick.
In California they are calling it “safe sheltering.” One friend said they scheduled a noon concert on their street. They arranged a playlist and everyone came out on their porches and played their instruments.
I am going to suggest virtual playing of “Farkle/10,000” with friends Linda and Larry. We can each have our set of five dice and we can be on FaceTime or Zoom for the game. Like safe sex, it is a game where everyone wins….
We are what we think. With out minds we make the world.
Let’s get creative to see how many ways you can find to keep joy and fun and lightheartedness alive to balance the inconvenience and fear.
After reading a rather long article related to the spread of COVID-19 I am pondering what I am willing to do for the good of all: Don’t Test, Don’t Tell — 10 Days Later.
Jim Koopman is an epidemiologist. Jim and his wife, Helen, host the meditation group that meets on Pine Island with Sheilana Massey. I sent the article to Jim this morning asking him the question, “Would this be over by everyone in the world totally isolating for 14 days?”
Here is Jim’s response and a link about him.
If you had absolutely perfect social distancing, where no one went out and touched things contaminated by cases, a couple weeks would work. We don’t know how effective our social distancing is. But we are hoping to cut transmission in half. If we could do that, the basic reproduction number would be about that of a typical seasonal flu epidemic with an established strain. But no one is expecting we will do that well. This experience, however, is going to tell us a lot about how infections spread in different parts of our population if we can only get really good testing soon and conduct extensive serological surveys with extensive behavioral and social data.
This morning I asked John to read the article before going to shuffleboard as he had planned. I reminded him I can only be as safe as he is willing to be. No one is an island. We are all in this together.
Without fear, guided by entirely by compassion and wisdom, we can ask ourselves simply, “What am I willing to do for the good of all?”
Kathy Zerler and I have committed to sharing a daily yoga practice via phone. Many organizations offering meditation, worship, and/or fitness classes, are opening up Zoom or Facebook Live gatherings. We are capable of staying connected, even while we are guided to practice “perfect social distancing” for the good of all.
Today, my meditation teacher, Barbara Brodsky, is bringing her husband home. Hal had a severe stroke two years ago and has been in a nursing home. Facilities are restricting those coming in and out to limit risk to an already vulnerable population. Barbara knows without access to his care team, Hal would be sentenced to bed, without therapy of any kind. As many of you know, Barbara is deaf and since the stroke Hal has been unable to use sign language.
Barbara’s message this morning about bringing Hal home: “Challenging, scary and wonderful!”
Yes, these times are challenging, scary and WONDERful….
Much of my life I have felt out-of-step with much of the world. Decades before smoking in public places was banned, I put up a “Thank You For Not Smoking” sign on my door. Some friends—even some family members—refused to come over.
The Way of the Wolf: The Gospel in New Images by Martin Bell was first published in 1968. “What the Wind Said to Thajir” is about a young boy, Thajir, who goes out to play and the wind speaks to him. This is what the wind said:
“Regardless of what anyone else tells you, regardless even of what your own experience might lead you to believe, everything that is, is good. At the center of things, life belongs to life.”
The wind went on, “Regardless of what anyone else may ever tell you, regardless even of what your own experience might lead you to believe, you are everyone who ever was, and everyone who ever will be. You are the whole of creation—past, present, and future. Decisions that you make today, in what is called the here and the now, will validate or invalidate everything that has gone before, and make possible or impossible everything that is to come. Anything that hurts anyone, hurts you. Anything that helps anyone, helps you. It is not possible to gain from another’s loss, or to lose from another’s gain. Your life is immensely important. Everything depends upon you.”
You must listen to hear what the wind said about destiny and hopelessness overcoming joy….
Messages of hope and a choice to feel joy, especially in the wake of COVID-19 in March of 2020, are immensely important. Joy depends upon you.
Here is a photo of the order to cease doing business in Michigan. Bars, restaurants, fitness centers, theaters…. all mandated to close through the end of the month!
This sort of disruption of daily life for WEEKS is unprecedented for those who live in the U.S. We have never hidden in the attic from the Nazi’s. We have been spared genocide. Our idea of starving has been being late for dinner.
The financial impact is worldwide. The shared humanity is world wide. We will get through this…. and good can come from it.
In the Christian New Testament, the letter to the Romans, Chapter 8, Verse 28, we read: And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
The wind told Thajir everything that is, is good. How in the name of heaven can we call this pandemic good? By finding the good within.
David Wagoner wrote “Lost” in 1999, and it is perfect for 2020:
Lost
Stand still. The trees ahead and bushes beside you
Are not lost. Wherever you are is called Here,
And you must treat it as a powerful stranger,
Must ask permission to know it and be known.
The forest breathes. Listen. It answers,
I have made this place around you.
If you leave it, you may come back again, saying Here.
No two trees are the same to Raven.
No two branches are the same to Wren.
If what a tree or a bush does is lost on you,
You are surely lost. Stand still. The forest knows
Where you are. You must let it find you.
— David Wagoner
(1999)
Pamela Chappell, recorded a CD titled, “One” and in the title song by that name she sings, “What if we are one? What if we are angels sent to one another? What difference would it make every day in the world?”
For the very first time in human history, we know the truth of Thajir’s wind. Humanity is one.
Draw from the depths of your faith, intelligence, kindness, wisdom, and compassion. Your life is immensely important. Everything depends upon you.
Hearing Barbara Brodsky speak candidly about her husband, Hal, being so very vulnerable in the nursing home. What if the facility goes on lockdown and he can’t have the therapy so desperately needed. She wonders if she should bring him home. “I want to know. I don’t know. Does anybody know?”
Barbara hears Aaron, “Come back into your heart. What does your heart tell you? What is the most loving thing in this moment? How can you do what you need to do without panic?”
We are in a place of “DON’T KNOW.”
This is the sympathetic nervous system, and this system has no “immune” system. This is the most vulnerable space during the global crisis related to COVID-19, because it is the most vulnerable space related to everything.
Life feels out of control. But is it really any more out of control than life itself simply is? Nothing inner has really changed, even though many outer conditions have changed.
Hand sanitizer is difficult to find. Rubber gloves are out of stock. Even medications necessary for survival are in short supply.
These conditions are current.
School closings, restricted travels, stock market reactions, global focus on COVID-19…. these conditions are current.
You cannot directly change the outer conditions.
As my fingers float across the keyboard I am watching the video of our Dharma Path class from March 10, 2020. I am including some of Aaron’s words in quotations below.
“Everything will change and again and again….”
“Your attitude, your energy—you have control over that much…”
“When you are honest with yourself, this is where you have control…”
What is out of control is the fear. This is not a new condition for humans. Fear is so familiar it feels natural, but it is neither natural nor healthy.
“What can one person do? Look at the fear…. beyond fear, almost panic…”
“Unconscious fear is just adding fuel to the fire….”
“Talk about your fears in a nonjudgmental way….”
My dear friend and yoga teacher, Kathy, and I were sharing such gratitude for our yoga practice. Yoga is mindful movement. The body is different every time you come to the mat. Your practice is to stay aware and to move from within.
Earlier this morning, upon the draw, the poker machine gave me a straight.
“We all want certainty….”
“Everybody wants to be healthy and have their loved ones healthy….”
“It is one world…. You wanted the problem to be their problem.”
“Whatever is happening to a baby on the other side of the world is happening to you….”
Life is a poker machine. You can only play the cards you are dealt. You know the game. You know what to save.
“How can I handle this in the most loving way….”
“Any virus is still a sentient being in some degree. It may not speak your language but it works with energy just as you do….
When enough of you come together and say, ‘No, you may not take over and kill.’…. Start speaking to the virus. ‘If you attack us and we die, you will die….’ Said in love, not in hatred and disgust. ‘Every sentient being deserves happiness.’ Praying for this virus. Is anybody here praying for the virus that it may have well-being without destroying others? This is where it starts…. The next step for the higher conscious of humans….”
The following poem was written on 3/11/2020 Lynn Ungarhttp://www.lynnungar.com/about/ Barbara Brodsky sent the poem to our class. It is timely, poignant, and clear.
Pandemic
What if you thought of it
as the Jews consider the Sabbath—
the most sacred of times?
Cease from travel.
Cease from buying and selling.
Give up, just for now,
on trying to make the world
different than it is.
Sing. Pray. Touch only those
to whom you commit your life.
Center down.
And when your body has become still,
reach out with your heart.
Know that we are connected
in ways that are terrifying and beautiful.
(You could hardly deny it now.)
Know that our lives
are in one another’s hands.
(Surely, that has come clear.)
Do not reach out your hands.
Reach out your heart.
Reach out your words.
Reach out all the tendrils
of compassion that move, invisibly,
where we cannot touch.
Promise this world your love–
for better or for worse,
in sickness and in health,
so long as we all shall live.
–Lynn Ungar 3/11/20
“Unless you do not take care of the world’s population, you cannot take care of yourself and your family….”
“Holding hands with your comrades and asking where is love here…. Thank you for coming as a teacher…. Now we are learning what we need to learn….”
“You are here to help the consciousness of earth to a higher consciousness….”
“I cannot destroy with hate to support love….”
“You are capable of this….”
“You have the ability to handle whatever comes with love….”
Here in Southwest Florida things are heating up, and I am not just referencing this week’s 80 degree temperatures. Following two deaths in Fort Myers—confirmed coronovirus—many are practicing voluntary social isolation with an eye toward protecting those most vulnerable.
A Michigan colleague, Jane Oelke, N.D., doctor of homeopathy, just published a great newsletter article. Please take time to read the entire article as “What’s in Your Cupboard?” provides some very wise steps we can all easily take.
The simple things are often most powerful.
For example, keep your mouth moist. We have all heard to “drink plenty of liquids” but did not know viruses thrive in a dry mouth.
That makes perfect sense as a dry mouth is one of the first signs of stress or anxiety.
We love the doTERRA Breathe drops, but sucking on a lemon drop or hard disc is good because your body being in parasympathetic nervous system helps your immune system stay strong. See Debra’s Wellness Tip “Vagus Nerve Stimulation” for more about that.
The closing paragraph in Jane’s article is very significant:
Most important – Stay positive!
Recently I read a mind-body manual that states viral outbreaks come at times of mass negativity. Do you think we have too much fear and other negative messages going on right now?
Rise above any negative thoughts you may have and take positive action toward believing in your own healing ability and support it with your activities.
Focus on the blessings in your life and create positive conversations.
Yesterday, while out riding my bike I saw a yard sign: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD ANYONE BUT TRUMP IN 2020. This is not a political commentary, it is a vital truth: Supporting anyone but anyone for anything is insane.
Can you imagine going to a restaurant and ordering anythingbut anything?
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, you have a heart and a brain and a gut for good reason.
And you have an immune system to keep you healthy.
Whoa…. fear can spread like wildfire. We can put that fire out.
A friend/colleague is part of several groups I attend here in Florida. She has cancelled the meditation group she hosts in her home and has reached out to another of our mutual groups suggesting the meetings be cancelled because “at least one, and possibly two, deaths in the county from corona virus.”
Her closing line in the email message is quite telling: I’m sorry to miss the group if you do go ahead and meet on Monday.
Admittedly, her husband is an epidemiologist, and we do not yet know the extent of risk.
Lama Surya has asked that we lend our energetic support tomorrow morning. He will be leading a prayer ceremony in Northampton, Massachusetts, and has asked that, if possible, we take the hour from 9 AM to 10 AM EDT (Sunday, March 8th) to chant or pray with the clear and specific intention of pushing back on this destructive coronavirus, COVID-19, and purifying and supporting all those who have been / will be infected or otherwise impacted.-19,
He has specifically asked that we practice where we are, rather than trying to participate in person.
We look forward to holding the energetic space with you tomorrow as we lift our body, speech and heart-minds in unison, in support of our beloved Lama, on behalf of all beings.
Don’t forget to put your clocks forward tonight before you go to bed if you are in a place that uses daylight savings time. Oh, and don’t forget to wash those hands!
Warmly,
The Dzogchen Center and Foundation
I got up in plenty of time to chant for the hour with this group. I have recorded voice memos of many of the chants we do on retreat. Hari Om is one of the chants I did this morning. In Sanskrit, “Hari” is a mantra to remove troubles and pain. In Hindu, Hari references the god Vishnu, remover of bondages.
Omniscience (/ɒmˈnɪʃəns/) is the capacity to know everything. In monotheistic religions, such as Sikhism and the Abrahamic religions, God is omniscient. “God” has the capacity to know everything. In Jainism, omniscience is an attribute that any individual can eventually attain.
Since the 6th century BC, and continuing today, Jainism has three guiding principles: right belief, right knowledge, and right conduct.
Here is another of the chants I sang this morning: Seems like such a long time, Holy Spirit, waiting, since I’ve drawn your breath in, silent and all pervading.
It is important that we DO something with the energy of fear that can get stirred up. We can sing, pray, chant. We can dance. I clean. My sister sleeps.
It is vital to remember we are able draw in the breath of the holy spirit and extinguish the raging wildfire of fear.
Life depends on us….
If you have requested email updates for posts, click on the image below to listen to the audio of the Hari Om chant:
Leaves are falling down
autumn of my life this is
I must choose to live
Watching baby breathe
innocent and fresh new start
coming from the heart
Hands wrinkled from work
burdened by beliefs not mine
wake before too late
She is blind but sees
his deaf ears hear love’s true call
death’s doorway beckons
I stand numb yet here
garden gate gapes wide with pride
flowers sing welcome
Rich soil grows wisdom
rain settles the dust at last
soon all will be past
Debra Basham 03-06-2020 (WC 84)
One month from today we expect to arrive back in Michigan. It would be denial to say the mold saga has not given birth to worry, fear, and concern. Is it gone? I am not just questioning the mold, but referencing also the freedom turning ever-so-surely into curiosity that has momentarily replaced the worry.
Putting multiple thousands on my credit card, writing checks for more multiple thousands. Grateful access to what we need. Thoughts, too, of those families helped financially by our plight.
It is said we do not fear death, but we fear dying as the great unknown. Yet, truth-be-told, we have been practicing living with dying since our first breath. We outlived puppies and kitties, and uncles and aunts. Cars and clothes, and friendships. All these no longer are the way they were.
Fragile at best, this bed of impermanence upon which we rest.
Mind goes to the blowing of the wind outside the window. Wondering when it is not blowing, where or what wind is.
Before I was “I,” what was I. And long after, hereafter.
Suddenly the idea! I can spend all of my earthy accumulations to run a full-page ad in the newspaper telling of the inner journey.
Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, hardly anyone reads newspapers any more. Trees are relieved. So am I.
News is depressing. Of course, the really good stuff gets ignored.
Disaster and doom, debauchery and damage—this is what people read.
All arises from the conditions. When the conditions are present, wind will arise.
Death, too, arises—like the sun—when it is time.
I write an open letter to the tiny house:
To whom it may concern,
The problem was more extensive than we anticipated, but we have done what we can. We are optimistic what we have done is enough.
Love,
Debra
My goodness, that is perhaps the words for the ad in the newspaper: WE ARE OPTIMISTIC WHAT WE HAVE DONE IS ENOUGH….
My mind is so busy. I pull myself away from the Tapping Summit to join my Friday morning writing group, and the group seems so focused on the mundane I want to leave. I want to be inside where it is safe.
I hope you will read this poem. You will relate. We all have human feet.
I begin to write:
Loss and Gain
Searching for safety and security we wander aimlessly through the lostness of our own minds, opening door-after-door only to look into a mirror. Caught in the haze of a maze, thinking the same thoughts year after year without so much as questioning where they are leading us.
A few tell-tale feathers lay on the ground outside the window
A ghost-like image where they wiped the dust upon impact
Beak, wing, and silence now where the THUD had been
Heart breaking loneliness hits my mind the same way the bird hit the window: suddenly and without malice of forethought. An old friend, this feeling of not being wanted, loved, or safe. I open another door. Perhaps this time something else will be there.
Eyes grow dull
Search for a stress-free environment begins
Danger results from well-meaning help
Snakes shed their skin to allow for further growth. The process is natural and happens throughout their lives, but it is not an easy process. Being human is not an easy process either, and I, too, search for a stress-free environment in which to shed.
Nigger
Negro
African America
Black
Words reveal our progress
Slogans from mindfulness t-shirts I have seen come to mind: Meditation is not what you think, You Have the Right to Remain Silent, Don’t Believe Everything You Think.
Perhaps hopeful, trusting, and calm will be the result of my new skin.
P.S. The Deep Spring Dharma Path Study Group with Barbara Brodsky is finishing our two-year commitment. We are finding the light within Sacred Darkness. Whatever the conditions in your life right now, you in your human feet are never alone.
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