John and I left Blue House in Punta Gorda at 8:00 am without a plan. Well, that is not quite true. Our plan was to be present with what was happening and make choices along the way. We got onto Interstate 75 heading north for the drive to Smyrna, Tennessee, where Stacey and all of her family live. Traffic was heavier than I expected at that time and REALLY heavy as we got near Sarasota.
It is not just heavy traffic that is nerve-wracking, it is the aggressive driving in heavy traffic. Vehicles that swerve in and out, going from the third lane to the exit ramp cutting off others. We all have had experiences where someone makes a risky passing to get ahead of us and then we are right behind that person at the next stop. Is it really worth the risk of property damage and/or injury or death?
For this trip, my maps of Florida, Georgia, and Tennessee were current and I said to John, “At any time you want or need to, just get off the interstate and I will figure out how to get us on from there.” So, at the area slightly north of Sarasota, he did just that. We were soon able to find ourselves on somewhat familiar roads – having driven to make music with our dear friend Ed Bennett up in Zephyrhills!
As we meandered to State Road 98, then onto State Road 19 John’s relief was palpable…. Much of the time we were the only vehicle on the road. Even when traffic was heavy or we were being caught by stoplights, from time to time the voice on Google Maps would say, “This route is avoiding delays on 1-75. You are currently on the fastest route.”
The oddest thing is that Google Maps usually shows traffic conditions as green, yellow, orange or red for normal, slow or stopped conditions. None of that was showing up on either of our phones! I have no idea why that was, but I began to use the paper map to identify what I thought the next goal town should be. I would program that town into Google Maps and preview route to keep us heading in the desired direction.
This reminds me so much of the way our emotions work (or do not work). Leaving clean sheets on the bed at Blue House I was transported emotionally back to Still Waters. Readers of Yellow Brick Road have likely heard about my friends, Delcy and Tom Kuhlman, who owned and operated a spiritual retreat center for decades. Delcy had a lovely way of asking guests to say a prayer for the next person coming on retreat as you put fresh linens on the bed. I found myself doing that!
Our not returning to Blue House next season is a long story. Our beloved home owners let us know they had concluded the responsibility for two homes was too much. John and I had found a place in North Fort Myers where we have jams several times a week. Linda and Larry were still looking when the owners determined the market is not conducive to selling Blue House right now. So, grateful it will be staying in the family! A life-long friend (Doris was in our youth group back in the 70’s) is planning to join Linda and Larry and she may very well be the next person to sleep in that bed. It was exhilarating to imagine I was praying for her.
A phrase popped into awareness: “All emotion arises from past similars.” The concept is totally familiar even if the phrase was new. This is stimulus response conditioning, a core element in neurolinguistic programming (NLP).
When an experience or event generates a strong emotion – an accident or injury results from any type of trauma – all of the elements become generalized. I totally know this from going through strong storms as a child. My mother’s fear was also an amplifier for my emotions. Other people might enjoy the sound of rain on the roof, but my central nervous system knew rain could be part of a larger weather event that could become life threatening. Having been in a serious auto accident resulting in my having an out-of-body (near death experience) my body goes into an air-brake motion habitually at the slightest hint of risk on the road!
All of this is so well articulated in NLP. The current event (such as the aggressive drivers in the heavy traffic) is triggering a pre-existing emotional pattern. You are never just responding to what is happening in this moment. You are reacting to something that you have previously experienced. The emotion that driver’s aggression or stormy weather produces is yours, buried in your subconscious mind and now being revealed by the trigger. Emotions activated by triggers can be pleasant as well as unpleasant.
John has LOTS of triggers with North Fort Myers. For many years during season he spent two days a week with his brother, Jerry. The “front porch” of our rental for next season looks right onto Swan Lake. Love for and fond memories of Jerry and Jeanne remain. He is thrilled that Jeanne’s brother and sister-in-law and a number of friends are still there. We stopped and visited one friend this past week.
Well aware our leaving 75 was adding miles and hours to our overall trip, the quality of each of those miles and hours far exceeded the cost. Sometimes life is just that type of balancing act. You can be grateful to know what you are gaining even when you are aware of losing something else. We are going to miss Blue House, and I am going to miss the biking in that area. We are going to enjoy being mere minutes from the Rec Center jams. We are thrilled that Michigan neighbors and music friends John and Lora Smith will also be in Lazy Days this next season. We look forward to visits to Blue House.
Meanwhile, our friends and family will find us livin’ on Lazy Lane….
Things change. Likely State Road 19 had been the primary north/south route before Interstate 75 was built. The roads we traveled were wonderful. I am sorry I did not get photos of the huge pecan orchards. Many lawns were ablaze with flowering shrubs in a spectacular spectrum of reds and oranges and pinks. We saw whole towns made up of the 500 or 600 square foot 1940’s built homes. It was like we were literally traveling through history.
The trip was truly a beautiful blessing. We are now enjoying a wonderFULL week here in Tennessee before continuing on home to Michigan next week.
Grateful for where we have been, where we are, and where we will be….
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