By Debra Basham, on June 1, 2025 I may have previously written about this, but I am intentionally not searching, because whether or not I have previously written about it, today I need to write about it again. One of the women who is part of our Glen Aire Wednesday evening jam was singing in the choir and we were invited to a nearby church for a program of gospel and hymn singing. I enjoyed the melody of most of the numbers, and while I resonated to some of the lyrics, I had an unpleasant reaction to the theology of original sin.
Yesterday we attended a wedding at that same church. It was a beautiful ceremony with a very special couple. The mother of the groom was in our youth program way back in the 1970’s. She is actually the one who introduced me to Healing Touch! We are so blessed to still have her in our lives. She even chose to move into Glen Aire after her mom and dad had both passed. Although I have officiated dozens of weddings since 1997, I learned some new things:
In addition to the six adorable flower girls, two little boys provided “Ring Security” complete with bow tie, badge, earphones, dark glasses — and a safety deposit box designed to hold rings!
While our friend and the mother of the bride were lighting the individual candles that the couple would use to light their unity candle “A Mother’s Love” by Jim Brickman was playing. Sharing some of the powerful lyrics:
Thank you for watching over me
All of the sleepless nights you lay awake
Thank you for knowing when to hold me close
when to let me go
Thank you for every stepping stone
And for the path that always leads me home
I thank you for the time you took
to see the heart inside of me
You gave me the roots to start this life
and then you gave me wings to fly
and I learned to dream
because you believed in me
There’s no power like it on this earth
No treasure equal to its worth
The gift of a mother’s love
After lighting the unity candle, the couple and then the two witnesses signed the marriage license. Getting that task done was often more difficult than performing the ceremony, so what an insightful way of transforming the mundane into something deeply meaningful. Following the signing of the license, a music video to “When God Made You” by E. Carswell and M. O’Brien showed the bride and groom from little to now, culminating with their engagement photos.
An interesting tidbit about this couple is that they were born in the same hospital one day apart so they were in the nursery together. They went to their high school prom “as friends” and, needless to say, they have each navigated numerous twists and turns separately to arrive together at the altar of holy matrimony. Imagine watching decades of images, including their prom picture, as you are hearing the lyrics “When God made you, He must have been thinking about me.”
Absolute perfection…. I sat barely breathing basking in the benefits of my recent experience of feeling so uncomfortable in that same sanctuary where I had an inner dialog with Jesus about the theology of unworthiness. I heard Jesus saying, “Of course, I am present in original sin theology. How could I not be? I am present wherever anyone is. I meet each person right where that person is.”
Being present at this wedding is something I will long remember. I understood the truth that humans react to things we don’t like. We are more often than not conditional with our loving. But unconditional love does exist. In Christianity Jesus is often seen as an embodiment of divine love, sacrifice, and redemption, representing a compassionate and nurturing aspect of the divine masculine. Known in Tibetan Buddhism as Chenrezig, Avalokiteshvara embodies compassion and mercy, showing a gentle and nurturing side of the divine masculine. In Native American Cultures often seen as a father figure, the Great Spirit represents creation, wisdom, and guidance, integral aspects of the divine masculine.
When the man and woman say “I do” to one another they are said to be married. The sacrament of marriage is a sacred covenant we enter into with ourselves first. It is a means of grace that strengthens relationships and helps individuals on the path to holiness. It’s a lifelong commitment, a public witness to God’s love, and a foundation for building a family and community.
Grateful to say, “I do,” and honored to experience this sacrament deeply.
By Debra Basham, on May 30, 2025 The quote “Rarely do members of the same family grow up under the same roof” by Richard Bach is a common saying that suggests true family bonds are not always defined by blood or persons living under the same roof, according to Goodreads and Tumblr. It emphasizes that family can be found in the connections we form with people who bring us respect and joy, regardless of blood relations. This is not to deny or denigrate blood relations that are also “members of the same family,” but brings to mind a saying on a Little Tramp greeting card I saw well over twenty years ago that love does not subtract or divide, it adds and multiplies.
This has never been truer in my experience than when I met the significant other of a precious friend for the first time on Wednesday of this week. The instant I saw into his eyes I felt love. We sat at a small round table in the farmhouse kitchen and shared deeply. Two days later my cup still runneth over.
The phrase comes from Psalm 23. This past Sunday morning a friend of over 50 years gave the message at her church, with that Psalm as the basis for her sharing, “My cup runneth over means my cup — my life — is full to the brim and running over like a cup that was dipped into a bucket of water and full to overflowing. This represents the fullness of God’s blessings in our lives.”
Over the past couple of months I have been listening to and/or watching individuals I have no prior experience with talk about things I barely comprehend, such as Richard Tarnas in The Second Axial Age saying Carl Jung calculated the birth charts of his patients and wrote to Sigmund Freud about synchronicity existing on a cosmic scale. He described a continual meaningful correlation between the movements of the planets and the archetypal patterns of human experience and said, “The psyche is not within us. We are in the psyche.” It is helpful to realize that astrology was taught at Oxford until the 1600’s.
Ilia Delio is a Franciscan Sister of Washington, DC, and an American theologian specializing in the area of science and religion, with interests in evolution, physics, and neuroscience and the import of these for theology. In Off the Page | Ep. 4 | Ilia Delio | A Theology of the Future she says the heart is a deep, deep center of personhood that’s opened up to the mystery of God. And that God is unstoppable in that highest good or love, and will go to the ends of the earth, and how not only is God good, but God desires to share that good with all beings. As she was in the process of the video recording of this interview I watched her cat wanted in. She got up and let the cat in and told the interviewer, “That act of love is higher than the act of knowledge alone.”
Whether you are fluent in astrology or even know what an axial age is, you know what love is. You know love is more than a feeling and love is not something you “do” or something that is “given” or “withheld.” But to say that love is higher than the act of love is likely a profound truth.
When Burt Bacharach offered Dionne Warwick the song What the World Needs Now initially, she turned it down, saying she found it “too country” and “too preachy.” The song proceeded to become a massive hit for Jackie DeShannon in 1965, and Warwick responded by recording it herself the following year, as well as re-recording it in the 1990s.
What the world needs now is love, sweet love
It’s the only thing that there’s just too little of
What the world needs now is love, sweet love
No, not just for some, oh, but just for every, everyone
Tarnas says it this way, “You really have to have an opening of the heart as well as the mind to take in the possibility of an enchanted cosmos…. It’s not just an intellectual conclusion, its something you have to bring your whole being into….”
My cup runneth over means we value all beings, not just human beings, and see family as not just blood relations.
Remember just put the spider out and let the cat in
By Debra Basham, on May 24, 2025 If I had my life to live over again,
I would ask that not a thing be changed,
but that my eyes be opened wider.
~ Jules Renard,from Gratefulness.org
It seems otherworldly a month has gone by without a Yellow Brick Road post. I could blame it on being busy, but I am not sure that is truth! This week I have been intentionally spending significant time with a focus on releasing mental constructs and/or habit patterns as an initiation inviting beings to live as a conscious creator of infinite possibility!
During this time of intentional focus I had a somatic breakthrough — awakening to a cat’s meow! Reading online now some very timely (and interesting) information about the spiritual message of hearing a cat meow:
Hearing a cat’s cry may signify a need to heighten your spiritual awareness. Cats possess sharp intuition and can sense energies humans often overlook. Their cry could be a gentle nudge, urging you to tune into your surroundings with greater mindfulness. Embrace this chance to cultivate deeper consciousness within yourself.
In the realm of spirituality, a cat’s cry may symbolize an impending emotional transition or shift within your being. Be open to exploring newfound depths of feelings that could surface. Approach this process with patience, allowing yourself to fully experience and integrate these emotional currents for personal growth.
Cats are often associated with mystery and the unveiling of hidden truths. When you hear their cry, it could signify that a veil is lifting, revealing insights or wisdom previously concealed from your understanding. Remain receptive, for profound revelations may be on the horizon, guiding you towards enlightenment.
Cats embody the essence of intuition and trusting one’s instincts. When you hear their cry, it may be a divine message urging you to embrace your innate intuitive wisdom. Learn to quiet the mind and listen to the subtle whispers of your soul, allowing them to steer you towards enlightened choices.
The cry of a cat could symbolize the importance of independence and personal freedom within your spiritual journey. These creatures value their autonomy, reminding you to honor your individuality and resist conforming to societal expectations that may restrict your authentic expression.
Wow. This “energy” is exactly what I have been sitting in and with this week. Cats are thought to symbolize the feminine. The following quotation is from Eluña, the channeler who has been leading a group to the Great Pyramid (with some time along the Gaza Strip). The intention being awakening a higher collective consciousness.
“Really allow the feminine in a non-distorted way to express itself in you. That might mean, allowing yourself to express your creativity in ways that you currently do not or that you used to, much as through writing, through drawing, through singing, painting, creating music…. Of course, spending time with our beloved mother Gaia…. Just tuning in and joining your consciousness with that energy, the energy of the Mother, is going to allow that energy to come through you in a balanced way. Regardless of the relationship that you have had with your own mother, you are going to be able to take on a different energy…. It’s not just the feminine, it’s The Divine Mother.”
And this week I found a wonderful song titled Shine Through by Goldford.
Shine Through
[Verse 1]
My memory’s fading, are the good days all gone?
I ask for my maker, she shows up in song
I see my behavior and where I go wrong
I guess it’s my nature, my head is too strong
[Chorus]
If I can only get out of my own way
That’s when the light shines on through
I’ve got nothin’ to lose but the weight
That made me a mountain to move
If I can only get out
Only get out of my own way
That’s when the light shines through
As the song says, if we can only get out of our own way the light shines through!
By Debra Basham, on April 26, 2025 No matter how difficult life
becomes, we must keep practicing
continuously. This is the only
way. Eventually we begin to see
and be part of a simpler reality
that we are not separate from,
but is actually nature itself.
~ The Daily Tejaniya
These words touch a space deep within as they are seen on the heels of a deep sharing with a friend who has enjoyed a wildly successful business career that had been cut to the quick by the current conditions. She had taken a couple of days off to inner listen for guidance to co-create going forward. Three key words were already present in awareness: simplify, co-creation, building community.
At one point we spoke about intention toward that which already is but is not yet known to be possible. Was electricity invented or was it recognized? Was fire created or observed and harnessed? Part of us understands fully that in every moment ALL already IS even as what is manifest is malleable.
I looked up the meaning of the word manifest. “To manifest something means to make it appear, become visible, or real, often through the process of focused thinking, belief, and intention. It can also refer to the process of showing something clearly, like a feeling or a belief, through actions or signs. Manifestation, in a more spiritual or self-help context, refers to the act of attracting desired outcomes into one’s life by focusing on them intensely, often through practices like visualization and affirmation.”
Last evening we attended an evening of gospel and hymn singing in a nearby church. One of our Glenaire Jam friends was singing in the choir. I noticed how differently I experienced the masculine pronouns for God; the theology of all being sinful; of everyone needing to be saved by the blood of Jesus to avoid an eternity of suffering. I have grown through this view and I am able to see it as fruitful even as these are not what I resonate with at this place on my path. Likely the exposure contributed to why curiosity about the “man” of manifest caught my attention this morning and led me to the Google search.
Reading lots about manifesting moved me to also do a search for the words co-create and Divine Feminine. “The Divine Feminine manifests through a variety of ways, including nurturing actions, intuitive guidance, and a deep connection to the natural world. It can also be experienced as a shift in perspective, where individuals recognize their own intuitive and compassionate nature, leading them to embrace their power and advocate for what they believe in. The Divine Feminine is often associated with nurturing, compassion, and a desire to protect and care for others. This can manifest in various ways, such as actively supporting family members, friends, or those in need, or advocating for causes that align with these values.”
Wow…. This is exactly what my friend was articulating! The phrase aspire higher popped onto the page of my journal
Thich Nhat Hanh encourages us, “The seed of suffering in you may be strong, but don’t wait until you have no more suffering before allowing yourself to be happy.” Are you able to notice how these words make it clear that we are not manifesting happiness but allowing happiness to be manifest in and through our lives?
The day’s theme continued to cast clarity on yesterday’s sharing as I read the Daily Quote from Deep Spring:
You’re familiar with transactional consciousness. It can be a very benign transaction. It can be a harsh transaction. Either way, it’s still a transaction which is centered in a ground of self. All transactions that come from you are grounded in a space of self. “I will do this. I will give that. I am dreaming of world peace, and this is what I’m willing to do to help co-create world peace.” But there’s still a self and an other to it. Transaction. Many of you have sat together in a meditation hall, coming to a space of connectedness where it seems like the meditators around you are just an extension of yourself, that there is truly no separation between you. You’ve done walking meditation where the earth under your feet and the growing things seem like a part of you. You don’t say to the garden, as you walk, “Won’t you please bloom so I can see your beauty?” You just say, “Ohh!” because it’s so beautiful. You are part of the garden. The flowers are blooming. The butterflies are blooming. You are blooming. There’s a sense of non-separation and unconditional love. I am not negating transactional creation. That’s the way your world works, for now. If you go into the gas station and say, “I am going to co-create gas,” and you open your gas tank, the gas station salesperson is going to come out and say, “First you have to put money in the slot.” But we’re changing it. We can change it so that the sense of separation dissolves and all beings may live in peace, health, and happiness. ~ Aaron
Blossoming is our true nature and right now everything is beyond beautiful. Ohh…..
By Debra Basham, on April 19, 2025
From The Daily Tejaniya on Saturday, April 19, 2025:
Trying to keep awareness continuous by trying to keep objects* continuous is a common mistake. Fixating on objects in this way is unskillful because we form craving for objects we like, and aversion towards objects we dislike. The skillful move is to keep awareness, not objects, continuous.
* Objects are thoughts, emotions, sensations, perceptions, etc.
Earlier this week I shared a tender conversation about the wisdom of not using social media for political discussions. I had just read a rather lengthy article about this subject. Very near the end of Stormy Weather: Enjoying the Ride, Joan Tollifson wrote words my heart agrees with deeply, “I do think there’s a place for genuine open dialog about the political issues of the day, but I believe that such dialog is best done in person, not in online comments or on social media. To be truly valuable and constructive, I think dialog about political issues should happen in a spirit of open listening and vulnerability, giving attention both to what others are saying and also to our own triggered reactions and emotions as they arise. Even after years of meditation, I’m still a beginner at that, often failing entirely.”
Nowhere does this truth reveal itself with more voracity than in our every day interactions about virtually every subject. For example, last evening we went for dinner and cards with Linda and Larry (our first opportunity since John and I began our trek north on March 28 and they followed north the next week). Rain was forecast so I drove down while John walked over via a stop at the mailbox.
As I walked in the house I was greeted by the delightful sight and fragrance of spring flowers. “Oh,” I called out, “daffodils!”
“These are jonquils,” Linda responded. I said nothing but admit to a curiosity about whether they are the same or not and later when John asked about picking some for our house for Easter Larry even said daffodils and jonquils are the same.
So, curiosity followed me home and this morning I put fingers to the keyboard with the question, “Are daffodils and jonquils the same?” I read a lot of information. Not all of information was of the same opinion (some generated by AI), but all of the information was presented as fact. The website I considered to offer some of the clearest understanding was a blog post on Wayside Gardens.
Often used interchangeably, daffodils and jonquils do have unique characteristics. All daffodils fall under the botanical name Narcissus, but a jonquil indicates just one type of Narcissus, Narcissus jonquilla and its hybrids.
I went on to read, “While regionally jonquils may be called daffodils, this is botanically inaccurate…. Daffodil flowers are typically lightly scented while golden yellow jonquils are highly perfumed…. Daffodils colors range from bi-colored to white, pink, yellow, and orange.”
My favorite message on the website was that no matter how you refer to them or what variety of Narcissus you grow and enjoy, they are one of nature’s greatest plants. I have some challenge remembering the answer to this-or-that questions so I have decided daffodils don’t smell or have a dull scent – D for daffodils, dull, and don’t. Your nose knows the difference. (Difference is yet another “D” word.)
All of this over spring flowers? Not really. It is more about how humans are having a challenge navigating the information age where we are often ushered into a lane of mistaking an opinion for fact without even being aware of the significance of that nuance.
This led me to look up Gulliver’s Travels, the 1726 novel by Jonathan Swift in which Lilliput and Blefuscu are two fictional island nations. After his son cut himself breaking a boiled egg at the larger end, the Emperor decreed that all eggs be broken on the smaller end. This quarrel ended up giving rise to “six rebellions … wherein one Emperor lost his life, and another his crown”.
Geesh!
Perhaps we should add opinions-thought-to-be-facts to the list of objects that can be fixated on in unskillful ways.
Note* Grandson Brad has a process he uses to ferret out facts. He is considering putting out a YouTube video that shows how easy it is to know what is true.
By Debra Basham, on April 13, 2025 The spiritual meaning of the Pink Full Moon in April 2025, specifically when it occurs in Libra, is about renewal, healing, and balanced relationships. It encourages emotional clarity and inner peace, urging us to consider our connections and patterns. This moon also symbolizes fresh starts, growth, and the return of life after a period of dormancy, much like the blooming of flowers in spring.
Here’s a more detailed look (all generated by AI):
Renewal and Rebirth:
The Pink Moon, named for the phlox flowers that bloom in spring, signifies a time of new beginnings and the resurgence of nature after winter. It’s a time to embrace fresh starts, both in personal and professional life.
Emotional Healing and Clarity:
This full moon encourages emotional illumination and allows us to release unresolved emotions, fostering a greater connection to our inner truth.
Balance and Relationships:
Occurring in Libra, the sign of balance, harmony, and relationships, the Pink Moon calls us to evaluate our interactions with others and ensure our connections are reciprocal and supportive. It’s a time to assess how we move in partnership with others and create more harmony in our relationships.
Introspection and Release:
The Pink Moon in Libra, opposite Aries, can bring up old wounds and insecurities, prompting us to release what no longer serves us and to re-evaluate our relationship patterns.
Venus and Romance:
With Venus, the planet of love and beauty, in its exalted position in Pisces and then going direct on the same day as the full moon, the Pink Moon in Libra is considered the most romantic of all full moons, bringing a sense of love and connection.
Practical Applications:
The Pink Moon is an ideal time to journal, meditate, create vision boards, or start new undertakings. It’s also a good time to purify your surroundings with incense or sage and connect with your soul’s mission.
This morning my prayer/meditation time included listening to some gospel piano. A friend, Tom Kuhlman, sent me the name of two artists: a man named Julian Brock and a woman named Denise. As I listened I began to write in my journal:
Jen and I had much lovely sharing about living with anxiety and a desire to control and freedom in Jesus. I boldly ask for a heart of love and trust and release of this history of fear. I hear, “THIS IS YOUR HEART. It is the mind/mammalian body that reacts with fear.”
I open The Daily Tejaniya and read, “Usually when meditators practice meditation, they are not that interested in learning the truth of body and mind. They are trying to control the body and mind.”
The primary scripture about renewing the mind is Romans 12:2: “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
Also in my email inbox this morning, a message about spring by Reid Tracy from Hay House:
Just like the earth begins to wake up and renew itself, we can do the same. Louise believed deeply in the power of affirmations to help us shift our thinking and reshape our lives.
Two affirmations that feel perfect for this time of year are: “I welcome new beginnings into my life” and “My life is continuously blossoming with opportunities.”
May all beings blossom with these pink full moon possibilities….
By Debra Basham, on April 10, 2025 From “Beyond Love Stories” by Rumi
“I have no more words.
Let the soul speak
with the silent articulation
of a face.”
My face today was tear-stained.
Having been gone for five months and just now getting home to print documents which have been collecting all this time, reading the fine print yielded much overwhelm. I had given it everything I had but I was digging a whole deeper by the moment. Trying to file a Federal tax return on TurboTax, I could not hold back the tears.
As I stretched out on the yoga mat, I could hear my mother saying she had wasted her life. Old feelings came quickly to the surface. How could she feel that as she looked at me and thought of her granddaughter, my daughter, and her great grandchildren?
I let some breath seep into my chest knowing these feeling were not MINE alone.
I waded in deeper emotional waters for an hour or so more before reaching out to Stacey ( she works for a tax planner!) because I had not wanted to burden her. Today is April 10.
Just hearing her voice brought forth new waves of emotion. She sent me a secure portal to submit all of the documentation and then let me know they would file an extension for me. Next month they will file the return. There are a lot of details being omitted here, but none that are vital to your recognizing that humans are navigating a lot of strong emotions right now.
The past couple of days I have been thinking about the opening chapter I read in a book a friend mentioned at the 6:30 am Tuesday meditation. It is written by a Forest Ranger Chaplain. Only the dog returned. The child was still missing as night fell heavy and dark around her parents, the chaplain, and those searching.
From Chapter 1, Here if You Need Me, by Kate Braestrup:
His wife is holding onto my hand, tightly, and her hand is cold. She turns her eyes to me as her husband continues: “I know that the longer the search goes on, the greater the chances are that my little girl is dead.”
…. “But wouldn’t she hear us calling to her and answer?” Ralph asks.
…. “She’s asleep,” I say.
…. “Little kids who get lost in the woods do something really smart,” I tell Marion. “When they realize they’re lost, they find a snug place – like under a bush – curl up, and go to sleep. Adults tend to keep moving; they keep trying to find their way out. They think they have to solve the problem themselves. Little kids conch out and wait for the grown-ups to solve it. If Allison is under a bush asleep, she probably can’t hear us hollering.”
Kate’s husband, a state trooper, was killed on the highway leaving her all alone with their four young children. She became a minister because it had been his dream.
The April full moon is two days away but feels fully felt.
Another friend at the meditation shared a song she listens to as an aid for crying when she needs to give space to the emotions that demand to be felt;“Sand and Water” is written and sung by Beth Nielsen Chapman:
All alone, I heal this heart of sorrow
All alone, I raise this child
Flesh and bone, he’s just
Bursting towards tomorrow
And his laughter fills my world, and wears your smile
All alone, I came into the world
All alone, I will someday die
Solid stone is just sand and water, baby
Sand and water, and a million years gone by
This evening as I shared with a precious friend who is navigating overwhelming health challenges and is justified in having had her own melt down today, I heard myself speaking the truth of these emotions, “They are not personal. We are truly all just walking each other home….”
Perhaps none of us is really ever all alone.
Barbara Brodsky reminds us often when the conditions are present emotions will arise. Amen. And a tired grin on this tear-stained face.
By Debra Basham, on March 30, 2025 John and I left Blue House in Punta Gorda at 8:00 am without a plan. Well, that is not quite true. Our plan was to be present with what was happening and make choices along the way. We got onto Interstate 75 heading north for the drive to Smyrna, Tennessee, where Stacey and all of her family live. Traffic was heavier than I expected at that time and REALLY heavy as we got near Sarasota.
It is not just heavy traffic that is nerve-wracking, it is the aggressive driving in heavy traffic. Vehicles that swerve in and out, going from the third lane to the exit ramp cutting off others. We all have had experiences where someone makes a risky passing to get ahead of us and then we are right behind that person at the next stop. Is it really worth the risk of property damage and/or injury or death?
For this trip, my maps of Florida, Georgia, and Tennessee were current and I said to John, “At any time you want or need to, just get off the interstate and I will figure out how to get us on from there.” So, at the area slightly north of Sarasota, he did just that. We were soon able to find ourselves on somewhat familiar roads – having driven to make music with our dear friend Ed Bennett up in Zephyrhills!
As we meandered to State Road 98, then onto State Road 19 John’s relief was palpable…. Much of the time we were the only vehicle on the road. Even when traffic was heavy or we were being caught by stoplights, from time to time the voice on Google Maps would say, “This route is avoiding delays on 1-75. You are currently on the fastest route.”
The oddest thing is that Google Maps usually shows traffic conditions as green, yellow, orange or red for normal, slow or stopped conditions. None of that was showing up on either of our phones! I have no idea why that was, but I began to use the paper map to identify what I thought the next goal town should be. I would program that town into Google Maps and preview route to keep us heading in the desired direction.
This reminds me so much of the way our emotions work (or do not work). Leaving clean sheets on the bed at Blue House I was transported emotionally back to Still Waters. Readers of Yellow Brick Road have likely heard about my friends, Delcy and Tom Kuhlman, who owned and operated a spiritual retreat center for decades. Delcy had a lovely way of asking guests to say a prayer for the next person coming on retreat as you put fresh linens on the bed. I found myself doing that!
Our not returning to Blue House next season is a long story. Our beloved home owners let us know they had concluded the responsibility for two homes was too much. John and I had found a place in North Fort Myers where we have jams several times a week. Linda and Larry were still looking when the owners determined the market is not conducive to selling Blue House right now. So, grateful it will be staying in the family! A life-long friend (Doris was in our youth group back in the 70’s) is planning to join Linda and Larry and she may very well be the next person to sleep in that bed. It was exhilarating to imagine I was praying for her.
A phrase popped into awareness: “All emotion arises from past similars.” The concept is totally familiar even if the phrase was new. This is stimulus response conditioning, a core element in neurolinguistic programming (NLP).
When an experience or event generates a strong emotion – an accident or injury results from any type of trauma – all of the elements become generalized. I totally know this from going through strong storms as a child. My mother’s fear was also an amplifier for my emotions. Other people might enjoy the sound of rain on the roof, but my central nervous system knew rain could be part of a larger weather event that could become life threatening. Having been in a serious auto accident resulting in my having an out-of-body (near death experience) my body goes into an air-brake motion habitually at the slightest hint of risk on the road!
All of this is so well articulated in NLP. The current event (such as the aggressive drivers in the heavy traffic) is triggering a pre-existing emotional pattern. You are never just responding to what is happening in this moment. You are reacting to something that you have previously experienced. The emotion that driver’s aggression or stormy weather produces is yours, buried in your subconscious mind and now being revealed by the trigger. Emotions activated by triggers can be pleasant as well as unpleasant.
John has LOTS of triggers with North Fort Myers. For many years during season he spent two days a week with his brother, Jerry. The “front porch” of our rental for next season looks right onto Swan Lake. Love for and fond memories of Jerry and Jeanne remain. He is thrilled that Jeanne’s brother and sister-in-law and a number of friends are still there. We stopped and visited one friend this past week.
Well aware our leaving 75 was adding miles and hours to our overall trip, the quality of each of those miles and hours far exceeded the cost. Sometimes life is just that type of balancing act. You can be grateful to know what you are gaining even when you are aware of losing something else. We are going to miss Blue House, and I am going to miss the biking in that area. We are going to enjoy being mere minutes from the Rec Center jams. We are thrilled that Michigan neighbors and music friends John and Lora Smith will also be in Lazy Days this next season. We look forward to visits to Blue House.
Meanwhile, our friends and family will find us livin’ on Lazy Lane….
Things change. Likely State Road 19 had been the primary north/south route before Interstate 75 was built. The roads we traveled were wonderful. I am sorry I did not get photos of the huge pecan orchards. Many lawns were ablaze with flowering shrubs in a spectacular spectrum of reds and oranges and pinks. We saw whole towns made up of the 500 or 600 square foot 1940’s built homes. It was like we were literally traveling through history.
The trip was truly a beautiful blessing. We are now enjoying a wonderFULL week here in Tennessee before continuing on home to Michigan next week.
Grateful for where we have been, where we are, and where we will be….
By Debra Basham, on March 23, 2025 “Shout! The Mod Musical” featured five powerful women singers, a live orchestra and soulful pop anthems and ballads by household names like Dusty Springfield, Petula Clark, Lulu, The Seekers, and others. Some of the songs included: “Wishin’ and Hopin'”; “To Sir With Love”; “Son of a Preacher Man”; “You Don’t Have to Say You Love Me”; “Georgie Girl”; “These Boots Are Made for Walking”; “Downtown”; “I Know a Place”; “All I See is You”; “Those Were the Days”; “A World Without Love”; and “Shout!”
The show is set in London capturing the swinging sixties and the dawning liberation of women. The story follows five women:
The Red Girl: The youngest and most hopeful character, initially feeling unsure of herself.
The Green Girl: A “racy” character, known for her flirtatious nature.
The Blue Girl: A wealthy and seemingly perfect woman who grapples with questions about her sexuality.
The Yellow Girl: An American character who travels to Britain to see Paul McCartney.
The Orange Girl: A married woman in her forties who suspects her husband is cheating.
The women all send letters to Gwendolyn Holmes, an advice columnist for the magazine “Shout!”, seeking guidance on their problems.
I lived through that decade and the sexist rules — for example, a girl could not wear pants/slacks to school. And The Sexual Offenses Act…. In 1967 that act made sex between two men who were 21 years or over legal. The legal age of consent for different-sex couples was 16, and a male could marry at age 16 but a female could not marry until age 18. Unless she was pregnant.
Technically I was still a 15 year-old girl on New Years Eve, 1965, when WE got pregnant, and a 16 year-old girl when WE got married on March 19, 1966. WE had to get our marriage license through Probate court, and WE just celebrated our 59th anniversary this past Wednesday.
I avoid saying “I” got pregnant or married. It took both of us for those things to happen, however, in 1966 “I” was the only one of us who was not allowed to attend high school. John graduated in 1967. I graduated in 1993. I was class president and valedictorian.
“Shout! The Mod Musical” was rich with eye-popping fashions, psychedelic dances, and new arrangements of familiar hits that made me want to sing along! The tears during the second act came as a surprise….
By Debra Basham, on March 20, 2025 Yesterday I listened to a talk with some surprising futuristic predictions of grave conditions in the United States. And this morning I saw a significant photo on the Facebook page of a friend. The photo is of a Robin sitting on the ground in some snow. That friend (and perhaps the Robin) have just returned to Michigan after some time in the south this winter. The caption reads: WTH!!!! I thought this was the first day of spring! This robin is not happy and neither am I.
According to Parker Palmer, “There is a hard truth to be told: before spring becomes beautiful, it is plug ugly, nothing but mud and muck… But in that muddy mess, the conditions for rebirth are being created.”
Most people can think of sayings that point to this reality of life. It is always darkest just before dawn. The only way out is through. When the going gets tough, the tough get going.
Many beautiful ways of thinking about every ending as a new beginning have also been articulated:
“If you don’t like the road you’re walking, start paving another one.” — Dolly Parton
“Forgiveness says you are given another chance to make a new beginning.” — Desmond Tutu
“Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing at all.” — Helen Keller
Having served as a doula helping women through childbirth, perhaps experience is best realized in Parker Palmer’s last line: “…the conditions for rebirth are always being created.”
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