If you, like me, have ever found yourself adrift emotions, best check out the information about how we are shaping one another’s brains all the time. Sounds True featured Bonnie Badenoch recently. Bonnie says trauma is a relationship experience that arises from our sense of being alone with pain and fear more than from the experience itself.
A good body of research exists to support her claims.
And we know from our own lives the gift of someone being with us at a vulnerable time.
We begin with ourselves, with being kind and receptive to all the different aspects of ourselves—the parts that are angry, the parts that are bitter, the parts that are joyous, equally welcome, and learning to really listen to ourselves with kindness and understanding. When we can do that, it really is much easier to do it for others as well.
Not that we can’t start by practicing with others—just repeating the phrase, “Everyone is welcome here.” So somebody is driving down the street and cuts you off; you think, “Everyone is welcome here,” it can lead more to a sense of asking, “I wonder what’s going on with that guy?” rather than wanting to scream at him. “I wonder what’s going on with him that he’s not able to attend?” So there’s a kind of warmth and a kindness that begins to develop. But it really has to also take root, I think, with us, because then we can practice leaving our judgment with kindness, and holding judgment side by side, then bringing all these other parts in until we feel a much more universal sense of welcoming presence for whatever’s going on in the moment.
But what if that did not happen? You are not doomed!
Many mind-body tools bring presence to those experiences of the past. Just so you know more, you may want to check out Alchemical Hypnotherapy.
One client I worked with gathered a whole team of Super Heroes to be with him.
What do you have to lose?
This week, be a safe and open space for others when you are able. If you discover you would benefit, find one for yourself, even if it is your puppy, kitten, or a trusted friend. Everybody feels better when you know you are listened to and cared about!
Tips from 5 April 2010 to 6 August 2012 are here: Archived Tips
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Rev. Debra Basham
Voice or text: (269) 921-2217 Email: debra@scs-matters.com http://DebraBasham.com http://ImagineHealing.info http://SurgicalSupport.info Small Changes … Infinite Results™
“If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.” ~ Mother Teresa |