While on retreat, stuff comes up. While it is common to think what comes up is about someone or something else, it is always coming from within. With a bit of kindness, awareness can expand, leaving a space of love and gratitude.
The October, 2013, retreat in Howell, Michigan, presented me with roommate stuff.
I was rooming with two other women, neither of which I know very well. After the last sitting meditation of the first evening, two of us went to bed. It was some time later the third came in to our room, turning on lights, opening and closing doors, opening (or crinkling) something, as she did her bedtime preparations.
The annoyance seemed to go on and on and on and on, but, thankfully aware of the gift that is ever-present, I was able to have compassion for my roommate and myself trying to sleep.
I forgave myself for any time in the past I was interrupting another.
I made up stories about how this woman must live alone so she was not used to being respectful of others.
I acknowledged the challenge she must be having trying to find everything she needed in the mostly darkened room.
Most of all, I was able to ask, “Can I keep an open heart for all of us through all of this?”
As I was able to lie there in the stillness, I was infinitely grateful for the practice and for this woman who was gifting me so beautifully….As one of the meditation teachers said, there is no experience in the world that is more rich in practice, more nurturing to body and soul, than retreat. We may be going on retreat with the intention to get away from it all, but while we are on retreat, we find ourselves in love with the ALL THAT IS.
