No Need to Worry

Dr. Seuss’ words remind me of an article by Max Lucado in Guideposts magazine titled “My Left Thumb” I read recently. Max noticed his left thumb had begun quivering. He immediately thought the worst because his father had died from amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, or ALS. He worried for weeks before making an appointment with a neurologist, who said, “No need to worry.”

The next time that thumb started to tremor, Lucado says he actually talked to his thumb, saying, “You’re not getting any more of my attention. The doctor made me a promise. You are harmless.”

In Mastering Family Therapy: Journeys of Growth and Transformation by Salvador Minuchin, Wai-Yung Lee, and George M. Simon share the findings of Virginia Satir. Satir is one of the three wildly successful therapists modeled by Richard Bandler and John Grinder in the creation of NLP. Satir observed that the lure of the familiar and predictable will almost always outweigh the enticements of the new.

Satir interrupted dysfunctional patterns of behavior by having the family enact familiar situations in unfamiliar ways. In the 2000 film, “A Rumor of Angels,” we see Satir’s findings demonstrated clearly.

Twelve-year-old James Neubauer (Trevor Morgan) is spending the summer in Maine. He’s emotionally estranged from his father (Ray Liotta), resentful of his stepmother (Catherine McCormack), and haunted by the events surrounding his mother’s death. James’s summer takes a turn when he crashes through a fence owned by the local recluse, Maddy (Vanessa Redgrave). Reluctantly enlisted to repair the damage, he’s at first put off by Maddy’s personality and candor, but they eventually form a bond.

“Who’s Bobby?” James asked Maddy.

“He’s my son.” Maddy replied.

“Does he live around here?” James continued.

“He was killed in the war.” Raw talk between these two.

“My mom was killed too.” Very raw talk.

“Do you ever talk to her?” Maddy inquired.

“Naw, she’s dead.” James reports the familiar view.

“We have to open our minds, communicate differently. If we use our eyes, we can see this far, but if we use our hearts and minds we can see A_M_A_Z_I_N_G things.”

I share how this happened for me following my dad’s passing in a small e-book called Where Moon Go? It is available online, or you can write to me for a free copy.

A parable about life, death, and afterlife, Where Moon Go? opens our eyes to all things natural. This tiny book carries a huge message. Taking a lesson from nature, and looking at the world through the eyes of a child, readers are invited to let themselves be carried beyond what we have been taught to experience what is real. When someone dies, the very fabric of life is altered. Each culture has a unique way of making sense of the inevitable, however, we often find little meaning in what we had believed. Borrowing wisdom from others can help bridge the gap, but allowing personal understanding to emerge from the depths of your own searching results in spiritual insight that can be not only life-changing but also life-enhancing. You have nothing to lose except your false beliefs and learned fears. Let the moon be your guide….

In “Roadside Assistance for the Spiritual Traveler” Rabbi Rami Shapiro writes:

November/December 2008
What happens when I die?

Where does an ice cube go in a tub of warm water? You are the cube, God is the water. For a while you seem separate from the water, but eventually you melt – you die – and discover that you, too, are water. Have fun being a cube; just don’t forget that all cubes are water, and everything is God.

January/February 2007

Imagine that the universe is a rope and you, your mom, and all things are knots in that rope. Each knot is unique, and all knots are the rope. When we die our knot unties, but the rope that is our essence remains unchanged: we become what we already are.

Life after death is the same as life before death: the rope knotting and unknotting. The extent to which you identify with a knot is the extent to which you grieve over its untying. The extent to which you realize that the knot is the rope is the extent you can move through your grief into a sense of fearless calm.

For me, the rope is God, the source and substance of all reality. When your mom dies she relaxes into her true nature, and realizes who she always was and is: God. I believe this realization comes at death regardless of who we are or how we live.

Every day we are faced with the choice to continue to believe what we have previously believed or open our minds. Only you know if today is the day you are ready to see A_M_A_Z_I_N_G things. As the doctor told Lucado, no need to worry….