“Even in a world that’s being shipwrecked, remain brave and strong.”
~ Hildegard von Bingen
More and more I am aware that we will never stop stuff from happening, so it is vital we learn how to remain brave and strong. Perhaps it is also important to remain kind. I certainly see many opportunities to give up, feel powerless, and react with anger or frustration. Case in point was my adventure helping a friend with AT&T.
I got an email from Ginny about 2 one afternoon, saying her home phone was not working. She could call out, but she was not able to receive incoming calls. People told her the phone would ring and ring. AT&T was asking her to provide a number where they could call her before they would take her information about her difficulties. Admittedly, it is most usual for someone to also have a cell phone, but Ginny did not. I grabbed a land-line phone (I have learned how to troubleshoot phone lines to avoid unnecessary repair charges), and headed to her house.
She had recently moved from one apartment to another in the same building, but I found her. It was about 2:20 when we placed the first call for support. The trail of incompetent actions was peppered with glimmers of hope as we figured out that the number we were calling in from was not her number! No wonder “her” phone would not ring in….
Each person told us another step we needed to take to resolve the problem, but as we would take that next step, the new person would say that was not right, something else needed to happen. I was diligent about noting the name of the person I was speaking to, and what phone number I had reached them at.
Patty in repair said she could not help us because she did not handle Michigan. Gail said the lines were obviously crossed, and discovered that while the billing address had been changed with her move, the service address had not. She expedited a service call to get things taken care of the next day. I headed home and soon received an automated call confirming the repair work order, and a message from Gail asking me to make sure I called customer service to get the service address changed so they come to the right apartment.
Marvin in customer service said the lines are not crossed, Ginny had been given a new number when she moved. I told him she did not want a new number, so he put in for a telephone number change—the change should happen within two hours, but I needed to call another number to cancel the repair request or Ginny would be charged for the service call since it was unnecessary. At 5:01 p.m., I finally got through to Hosea. He said he could not give me a cancellation number proving that I had called to cancel the work.
At 8:30 a.m., I gave Ginny a call to discover that the problem with her phone still existed….
I took a few moments to look over notes I had recently taken at a retreat on mindfulness:
Billions of sentient beings are watching the earth plane. They are learning from you. You are approaching a tipping point. Your earth came into being as an experiment: Can the amount of compassion on earth affect the whole universe?
Everything that shows up can be seen as perfect for our remembering what is really important. I did some deep breathing, and some EFT tapping, and I even took a homeopathic remedy for relieving stress before I picked up the phone to call AT&T yet again. This time I spoke to Keisha who kept insisting Ginny’s original number is not available. The names and numbers of all those I had spoken to, along with a confirmation number for the work order, did nothing to move her from her position.
I don’t think I was mean, but I know that I was firm: “Do what you have to do to get me to your supervisor. I have an appointment in ten minutes, and this needs to be resolved now.”
At 9:17 a.m. Jackson came on the line. When I hung up I had confirmation numbers for both a discontinuation of service and a reestablishing of service.
I read on in my notes from the retreat:
The loyal opposition takes delight when you get caught in blame. As soon as you get caught in blame, you are serving the loyal opposition…
After my appointment, I gave Ginny a call. She answered and I said, “I am calling you on your number!” She knew her phone was fixed because a bit earlier she had received a call from an organization asking for a charitable donation. It was an organization she has supported in the past and she was so thrilled that they had been able to get through to her, she gladly made a generous donation to their cause!
What an amazing gift this process was. Every step of the way I was able to notice if my body was in stress. When it was the most frustrating with the insistence Ginny’s number was not available, I thought about a situation I had heard of a few days prior. The man needs a double lung transplant and after having been preapproved for the insurance coverage, while waiting for the donor organs to come available, his coverage had shifted to his wife’s policy. Although both were Blue Cross, the new coverage had denied the procedure. Meanwhile, he is next on the organ donor list…
Remembering that the current situation is a vehicle for greater love and compassion, I began to breathe the frustration and fear that couple was feeling into my open heart. I let my own frustration go as I felt that deeper sense of need. My heart began to expand and I could feel my compassion reaching out to this man and woman, and to Ginny, and to each of those AT&T employees who had to deal with our frustration.
Whatever you see that is off-balance, first you must watch the part that wants to fix it. Find the place within that has compassion.
When clarity and love say “no” there are results. Those results may not be in your lifetime. Say “no” compassionately, rather than thinking you are right.
As Ginny thanked me for my sense of humor and my willingness to be of support, I found myself grateful to her. You know how good it feels to genuinely be of service….
P.S. A couple of weeks later, the game played on when Ginny called to say she had paid another phone bill. As it turned out, she had been charged to set up a new service, and was being billed for both numbers. I spent 47 minutes on hold before getting disconnected, so the next day I made a trip to the local AT&T store, only to be told billing questions have to be handled over the phone! At 5:44 p.m., a gentleman named Nevada (like the state), from the Chicago office, issued an $88 credit to Ginny’s actual account. Now she only has to wait month after month after month, to be sure it really is all cleared up. Only a radical optimist can bear to bear witness!