Understanding Curing and Healing
I once heard Dr. Bernie Siegel tell an auditorium filled with people not to do a single thing just because it might help him or her live. He told us that death is 100% certain. While those were shocking statements, it is a fact that, in spite of all the advances in medical technology and the increasing skill of physicians and surgeons, death continues to be inevitable.
That being said, it is vital we all develop a profound understanding of curing and healing.
Perhaps one of the most important things physicians and medical support staff can do is to recognize that patients are more than—and more complex than—their physical problems. In Peace, Love, and Healing, Bernie Siegel says, “If we are willing to treat more than their diseases, by being there for them, supporting them and loving them, in addition to caring for their physical problems, we may be able to redirect lives, not just treat illnesses” (p. 120).
If medicine, meaning drugs and surgery, were the cause and healing were the effect, then think for a moment about why it works some times and not others, and become aware now of why some people heal without medicine, drugs, or surgery.
Think about something really physical, such as a hip replacement, and notice how everything the surgeon does—everything the nurses do—assists the natural healing process rather than “makes” that hip heal. If healing results, not simply from what is done to the individual by others, then what is it that actually causes or allows healing to occur?
In Love & Survival: 8 Pathways to Intimacy and Healing, Dr. Dean Ornish reminds readers that even when drugs and surgery are necessary, they are just the beginning. The physical body—the heart—is more than just a mechanical pump. Ornish says you also have an emotional heart, a psychological heart, and a spiritual heart.
“Curing is when the physical disease gets measurably better. Healing is a process of becoming whole. Even the words heal and whole and holy come from the same root. Returning healing to medicine is like returning justice to law.”(p. 15)
Healing is the most natural of processes. Remember a time when you cut a finger or skinned a knee. Something inside you allowed healing to occur. That something inside you is your innate healing capacity. Your greatest goal, as facilitators of healing, is to support the individual discovering the attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors that turn on this innate healing capacity to its maximum. While a desire for a cure might see death as failure, look at life as the process of living, as more than flesh and bones, and you gain a greater sense of the sacred art of healing.
“Illness and the opportunity it presents people to engage consciously and actively in a journey toward wholeness can be one of the most transformative experiences that life offers. It provides you with space for self-reflection, for caring for yourself and your needs in a way that may not have been possible in your busy everyday life. It can give you time for learning about who you are, your purpose, your potential; a time for reassessing your priorities and the value of your relationships, work, and possessions. Illness (or disease) can be the beginning of a deep, spiritual quest.” Rituals of Healing: Using Guided Imagery for Health and Wellness, by Jeanne Achterberg, Ph.D.; Barbara Dossey, M.S., FAAN; and Leslie Kolmeier, R.N., MEd., (p. 12).
The things that promote a sense of meaning in our lives, our connection to others and to what is sacred, can heal our lives even when medicine is not able to cure our bodies.
Death is not the enemy. The real enemy is living an unhappy, misdirected life. In many cases, illnesses are a manifestation of the need for redirection, and sensitivity to that need may be an important gift physicians and other medical staff can offer. Healing may lead to a cure, but even when a cure is not possible, healing may still be achieved.
Recently, I had the honor of meeting a couple. The husband is going through some very frightening (and debilitating) symptoms. Their preference is to use medication and surgery only if absolutely necessary, so they explored several other therapy options—acupuncture, chiropractic, homeopathic, nutrition, to name a few.
In Sacred Choices: Thinking Outside the Tribe to Heal Your Spirit, author Christel Nani makes some very good points about how powerful unconscious “tribal” beliefs guide our behavior and choices and in ways that can affect our health. She writes, “Unfortunately and paradoxically, some tribal rules are contrary to your authentic nature and needs.” (p.2)
One of the most significant lessons you can learn working in energy medicine is the reality that you cannot know what is best for another. The best you can be is an impartial witness. Using tools of intuition, insight, inspiration—and good old common sense—you can begin with the end in mind (a wonderful saying from Stephen Covey).
The husband was on the massage table, as his wife sat in the rocking chair. Music was playing softly in the background, and water was gently bubbling in the tabletop fountain. The blinds were drawn, and in the dim light you could almost cut the tension in the room. “Do you think he is going to make it?” her words came out as a near-whisper.
“I am reminded of the way my good friend, Linda, thinks about things. She would say it has not been decided yet.” My words reflected the truth of the matter for all of us that we will not stay in these bodies forever. I went on to say my belief is we are living out a journey of the soul that has meaning and purpose beyond what our conscious mind might recognize.
Another friend of mine sat in this valley of the shadow of death for nearly a year with her husband, Gary, as he was hovering somewhere between “here” and “there” before he recovered and returned to an active life. My experience has been that we cannot keep others here, and we cannot force them out.
Woody Allen said, “I’m not afraid of death; I just don’t want to be there when it happens.”
In Tuesdays with Morrie, author Mitch Albom writes, “Death ends a life, not a relationship.”
It is crucial we begin to see that wellness is more that simply not being sick. It is an attitude.
John Quincy Adams, on the grand occasion of his 80th birthday, was asked by a friend, “How are you?” to which he readily replied:
“I thank you. John Quincy Adams is quite well but the house in which he lives at present is becoming dilapidated. It is tottering upon its foundation, time and the seasons have nearly destroyed it, its roof is pretty well worn out, its walls are much shattered, it trembles with every wind … I think John Quincy Adams will have to move out of it soon, but he himself is quite well, thank you.”
In spite of current symptoms, regardless of what appearances might lead you to believe, you are able to see the well-being which is ever-present in every person at every moment. Healing is always possible, so your seeing that well-being at the core of the individual reminds him or her that he or she is quite well, thank you….